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I know we haven't contacted in a while, but you leaving to South Carolina stunned me. Being friends with you was awesome and I hope when you come back, we can contact each other like before. I just have to renew myself to you and get comfy again. You are brave and smart and I know you will do well in boot camp. Good luck, stay confident and strong. (:
hahaha, thank you! i wonder who this is but thank you for your support and encouragement. :) |
♥ 3
→ 11 Mar 12 at 3 am
→ 11 Mar 12 at 3 am
So I’m not the best at “see you laters” and “goodbyes” and whatnot, so I’m gonna try to get all my feelings out this way.
When you told me that you were joining the Marines, I was slightly upset. I have a long sad history of people abandoning me and leaving (especially for the military), so I wasn’t exactly happy about the idea. Nevertheless, I tried my best to support you in any way. (don’t hate me) When your departure for boot camp became postponed, I got excited. I thought that, maybe, you wouldn’t end up going because going meant leaving me. I don’t exactly exactly have the pleasure of seeing you every day due to the long distance of our schools. But whenever I’m around South Philly or Chinatown, I always call you with hopes that you’re in the neighborhood so we can hang out after several weeks (sometimes months) of not seeing each other.
It sucks that I never get to see you, but that is what our friendship is! Sure, I don’t get to see you all the time. But those texts and calls and Facebook posts and Skype chats are what make our friendship so strong and so awesome. We don’t always need to see each other. (ALTHOUGH IT WOULD BE NICE!) But when we do, it’s one of the greatest feelings in the world. You support me, I support you. Through everything. That’s just how it’s supposed to work. Lately, I haven’t exactly been the best best friend. I haven’t been supporting you. I’ve been so upset with you because you are actually leaving. I got upset and sad when you would cancel on me because you had Marine-related things to take care of. I’ve been so selfish, all I’ve thought about is how you leaving affected me and how lonely I’d feel once I realize that I couldn’t exactly talk to you whenever I wanted. But now I realize it isn’t about me. It’s about YOU. You’re doing this to better yourself. As long as you’re happy and well, I have absolutely nothing to complain about. I’m sorry It took me this long to just figure that out.
Ok, so you leave tomorrow. 3pm. And it makes me really sad. I wish I could see you off or something, but I can’t. I know you’re kinda nervous and excited, and I don’t blame you. I would be too. It’s a pretty big step, but I know that you are gonna be great. Everyone’s gonna be intimidated with your big head (once they see you with all your hair shaved off) and your unusually orange skin. Can’t nobody tell you nothin! Besides, If some Sergeant yells at you, just pretend it’s me calling you to yell at you at 3am again. You’ve suffered enough verbal abuse from me to go through anything unscathed. You’ll be just fine. And if you aren’t? You have the biggest support system in the world to come home to. Believe in yourself. And if, at one point you lose that faith in yourself, just know that I haven’t.
I’m really happy we’ll be writing to each other while you’re gone. You cannot fathom the amount of happiness I will feel in my heart when I open my mailbox to see a letter addressed to me from South Carolina. It’ll be just like writing on each other’s Facebook walls again. Until then, and after, I plan to check my mailbox twice every single day, just to make sure I don’t miss it. To be honest, I’m just really relieved you’re not going off to war yet or anything. I wouldn’t be able to control myself. Overall, I am just so proud of you. I can’t wait to tell people that my best friend is a United States Marine. Can you say jealous?!
See you in three months!
Joyce ♥
This will be the last writing I’ll post before I leave for boot camp in South Carolina. If you asked me a year ago the question “what do you want to do with your life”? I would probably reply with an answer like “I don’t know.” I really had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Even if I did, I didn’t have the motivation or the discipline instilled in me. Just seeing everyone else succeeding made me jealous. I wanted to be motivated. I wanted to be successful. I wanted to be like them. However, I was lazy. I saw myself as a failure and an underachiever. I wasn’t like any of them…I was the complete opposite. It’s stressful having people criticize you and expecting more. So many people expected a lot from me. Especially, my mom. I failed her expectations. Yet, she still believes in me. Honestly, if I was her, I would have given up on a son who has been nothing but trouble. She should expect more because I definitely can accomplish more. So I have to do great things with my life and not disappoint her again.
I was never interested in joining the military whatsoever. However, when I only applied to only one college that I applied last second to, terrible grades, and bad habits, I felt hateful of myself. I put off everything until the last second. Sometimes, I didn’t even accomplish the task because there simply wasn’t enough time. I started to blame others for my own faults. I wasn’t the better man. I was just a little boy who didn’t take responsibility for his own future. Getting rejected from Temple really opened my eyes. Above all, I decided to join the Marines because I felt like I needed a big change. I want to become disciplined, gain a sense of confidence in myself, and become a role model to society. I believe the Marines could give me the change I am looking for. Even if it’s a little change, it would be a positive change. I wanted to do something with my life than do nothing and hate myself more.
I really hope I come out as a better person. I don’t want to change the person that I am, but just my habits. The lazy, undisciplined, and annoying habits causing me unwanted stress. I want to help people, but how can I help people if I can’t help myself? Furthermore, I can protect the country which is a way of helping others. This journey is a journey where I find my inner-self that I lost awhile back and gain new ones. This isn’t for anyone besides myself. I won’t give up until I achieve what I want. I won’t give up on myself. On the other hand, I won’t give up on the people who believes in me. I want to get stronger physically. Most importantly, I want to get stronger emotionally. This is the first step for greater things from me. I know when I graduated, it will be the proudest moment of my life. 3 months of blood, sweats, and tears. I want to thank everyone who support my decision. I’ll write to you guys once I get settled in boot camp. Next time, I’ll post. I’ll be a United States Marine.
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good luck in boot camp!
thanks! |
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what do you mean when you said the shipping date on your page? your leaving?
yeah, i’m leaving for marine boot camp |
Some people live in the past for too long. Mike Dikta once stated, “I don’t believe in living in the past. Living in the past is for cowards. If you live in the past, you die in the past.” I believe this quote is one of the greatest quote ever. People live in the past because the past is more comfortable than reality and most people don’t like changes. However, one can’t live in the past but memories are great to have. Some people just live in the past because they don’t want to accept the challenge that they are going to have in the present or in the future. They’re just afraid to fail and very afraid of the changes that awaits them. They’re simply weak and cannot imagine the beauty of life without complexities. If people could try to make each day an adventure and try new things, then new things would be so scary. Live with the past in the present life and anticipate what you will have in the future.
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[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
"Soundtrack 2 My Life"
Kid Cudi
Man On The Moon: The End Of Day
(2197) plays
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